Haan? U noe wat i m talkin abt.
Y ur ful msg luks lyk 1 sentnc no1 tot u puntuashun ur sms luks lyk telegram ya pls use fulstop.
Bt sumtyms u use 2 many. Y u put dot-dot-dot aftr evry few wrds? Put 1 only. Pls.
Bt pls use mo than 1 lettr ya. ‘Y’ is lettr, ‘yes’ is wrd. U tink i m amirkhan, asking ‘Should there be a strict law and strict action against those who drink and drive? (Y/N?)’? No na? Stil u act lyk u lost haf ur fingrs 2 frostbyt.
N omg, y da hel dyu use 10 million ‘o’s wen u rite ‘no’? R u hindi flim heroin? Ur thumb fel in ❤ wid keypad? N 2 much of dat ‘oo0oh’ n ‘aaaah’ and ‘hmmmmmmmmm’ is happening, k? U r havin orgasm, awat?
Enuf wid da smileys!!!!!!!!!! R u monkey? U dnt noe 2 speak? Den y dyu stuf msgs wid so many emoticons? I dnt care if dey have goggls n lipstik n big fat tears; its not UR face na? Sumtyms u use sooooo many, it luks lyk mah cell hs jaundis.
Y u change spellin of wrds? Wat is dis ‘studee’,’ muvee’, ‘babieee’? Ur name is webster? U rote dikshinary? Hav sum rispect yaar.
R u part of gr8 Amrican plot to rplace al ‘s’ wid ‘z’? No? Den stop sayin ‘iz’, dammit.
N wat is dis ‘da’? R u wrapper frm da bronx? Say ‘the’, lyk norml ppl.
Grammer is dyin, spellin is ded. U hav T9 dikshinary na? Use! ~Buys 20 grands ka fone n duznt noe hw to rite 1 ful propr sentnc. Shee~
U hate vowels kya? Read dis – Wrrr. Makes sens? No? Dats mah surnam widout ‘a, i, e’. U want me 2 do dat to ur nam? U dnt riks gods angr n rite ‘Rm’, ‘Shv’ n ‘Jss’ na? Den dnt riks mine by riting ‘Mrgnk’. (dnt 4get da CaPitAls.)
I noe lyf is shrt, bt nw der r 2 many shrt frms. ‘Gn’ is da sound u make wen pottie duznt cum out. ‘Roflmao’ seems lyk u r makin fun of gr8 commyunyst leeder. N u no wat ‘lol’ reely means? ‘dangle’ or ‘sag’. Wat of urs is danglin or saggin? W8, dnt tell me.
N wtf is WTF? U wanna say ‘fuck’ na? Say it. Fuck. Der. At least dnt giv gaali in shrt frm ya. Feelin goes.
Sum shrt frms r ok. 4 eg, by da tym u finsh typin ‘immediately’, its alreddy l8er. Bt if u shortn ‘tutorial’ 2 ‘tut’, wat wil u do 2 ‘title’?
I noe only 160 lettrs cum in 1 msg. If u wanna save mony, email me.
Enuf is enuf.

* * *


31 thoughts on “Y DYU RITE LYK DIS?

  1. otstndng. hvnt stpd lafng.

    “Buys 20 grands ka fone n duznt noe hw to rite 1 ful propr sentnc. Shee” ws hlrius

  2. My eyes actually started watering and head started hurting after reading this. But then, I couldn’t stop reading because it was so funny!
    ha ha!
    So my theory about why people write like this is for two reasons:
    1) Because they are lazy bums in a hurry. (Rather magnanimous, no?)
    2) Because they want to look cool and ‘fit in’. If everyone is using such language, of course they have to use it too!
    I would like to hear what your theory is. 😛

  3. Hahahaha. I actually think it’s quite incredible that this stuff comes naturally to so many people. It’s a real struggle for me to come up with acronyms for everything and remember which vowels can be omitted and which can’t. So yeah, I’ll stick to running through sms-packs earlier than others. Downside of being voluble, but whatodo?

  4. Wrrr. Makes sens? No? Dats mah surnam widout ‘a, i, e’
    ‘Gn’ is da sound u make wen pottie duznt cum out 😀

    Damn!! It hurts, coz I’m still laughing!

  5. You have a flair for writing Mrigank 🙂 please don’t let mbbs stop you from pursuing your passion.. have seen it happening to many of my friends (including myself).. will keep coming back to your blog for more such good reads.

  6. I don’t know what’s scarier; that half the people i kno ryt lyk dis or that I understood what you wrote too easily. *shudder*
    ‘Buys 20 grands ka fone n duznt noe hw to rite 1 ful propr sentnc. Shee~ ‘ killed it. U funy. Me folow ur blog.

  7. It is funny. And I have similar sentiments. But could not read fully. My head hurt trying to understand those words. Kinda obsessed about a language and it beauty in full. So cant take more than the 160 characters 🙂
    Good one. Keep writing!

  8. Haha Dude! You’re awesome. 😛
    Seriously, I don’t remember the last time I caught myself sitting down to read someone’s blog, for hours (I swear)!
    I’m so irrevocably in ‘luv’ with your writing now!

    dnt u evr stp! 😛

  9. Now that was simply amazing! I share the same sentiment. Sometimes it is really irritating, especially “k” and “sry”.
    RIP spelling 😛

  10. You killed.. and I almost died laughing … please write something on Rahul Gandhi and his address at the chamber of commerce…

  11. Bitch Please . You have used all the words without the vowels right from the start. So stop giving lectures and let people text the way they are comfortable with. God bless !!

  12. I really worry about the spellings knowledge of the current generation as most don’t know the correct spellings, all they know is the sms language and for some people like me its really irritating as there are some words I just can’t make out at all!!

  13. Fantastic ppst. You have a wicked and smart sense of humor. I’m going to be a regular visitor. Loved your Pangs post as well.

  14. Oh dear lord i need an award for not bursting out loud and containing all my giggles under my breath ( office decorum you see).
    Mrigank, stop with your doctor work and become a humour blogger man – Many money you will make and super famous you will be 🙂
    If you EVER stop writing (or even think about it) I shall do a correspondence course in Penectomy surgery and track you down to be my 1st experiment.

    Hats off on your humour. Quintessential it is.

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